A Tale of Woe and Excuses

I do apologize for my lengthy absence, but I assure you, there is a good reason for it. I spent several weeks as of late studying at a prestigious local academy. I put utter devotion into my noble studies, which kept me very  until a fateful event struck.

On a fine September evening, I was cruising over the shining waters of Lake Michigan in my personal balloon, when a fateful disaster struck. A mighty freshwater kracken sprung up from the waters, grasping my balloon in its tentacles and dragging me down into the water. (Normally I have the skill to steer around such creatures, but I was not expecting one to appear so early in the evening.)

In the depths of the frigid lake, I struggled in the beast's grasp, until I was able to locate and take up my trusty cutlass. In one desperate swing, I succeeded in slicing through the kracken's tentacles Once the creature had been frightened away, I fought my way to the surface, and, clinging to the wreckage of my beloved balloon, awaited rescue. I survived that night, although the beast had entirely crushed my right leg and slightly jostled my spinal cord, causing me to spend several weeks confined to the local medical complex.

I went mad with the terror of what I had seen, and thus was sent to an asylum for yet another week. Despite the horrors of the place (many of which were located in the cafeteria--French fries simply should not bounce off of hard surfaces), I managed to find a few kindred spirits. A fellow inmate of mine created this mechanical aid to the healing of my leg:

So now here I am, back at home, more or less confined to my bed, and left with no excuses to keep from my Aether-web journal. More DIY tutorials, book reviews, and tales of my adventures soon to come.